Saturday, January 5, 2008

True Love Never Did Run Smooth

Even though I've heard stories on famous love stories from this world, I was just amazed at this line from Shakespeare 'True Love Never Did Run Smooth'.

I am no writer, but I've found that writing about painful subjects give you an outlet just as your regular crying or doing something worse. As I think more about this line, I wonder about what true love is. When two people break up or let's just say one rejects the other because it's rarely mutual. There can be umpteen reasons. Sometimes past behavior or current habits push people away. People separate. Did they really separate? Because if they truly loved each other at one time, how is it possible that they split up? Let's assume that one person's behavior was the worst and it created hatred or disinterest in the mind of the other. Should both or one person stop loving in that case? Can negatives become so heavy over the positives? Ultimate question people ask is, if I stay, will he or she change? Now, hold your thought there because I am going to quote some words from ancient wisdom...

One Arabian parable says...Write the bad things that are done to you in the sand, but write the good things that happen to you on a piece of marble.

I believe in these words. I have been through some bad things done to me all along my life. I mean it generally. Because YOU and ME were brought to this earth to be tested. God will not give you if you do not give up your fears and work hard to climb up that hill. There were no freebies sprinkled for you. In this test, you will move with vigor sometimes, but you will also cry and fall in despair at other times. You will want the help. Then, you ask the god and he shows you the way. That is certainly promised. But, it's YOU who must do it. Therefore, take a moment and think. What really happened? Someone rejected your love or you withheld your love for someone? Is the other person repenting for his or her behavior and made remedies? You say, it does not matter now because your love is gone. Gone? Where? Were you loving before? Imagine mother's love for you. Does it go away? Some kids are just incorrigible, aren't they? Do their mothers start loving less? If not, why not? You would think it's the blood relation because that's the obvious. But, what about the adopted son or daughter? Do moms love less to the adopted ones? If you answered No, why? No, love is never about blood relations. It's a bond. It's unlimited. It's 'for'-giving. It knows no boundaries. People are called crazy. They are called blind in love. True love soaks your soul. Believe me, it goes that deep. It touches the very existence of YOU. You would have your reasons later to deny or reject that love. Did you really reject that love? Have you ever tried telling your mom that I break up with you and she still loves you? Did you really have the courage? Did you go very far after doing that? No, your ego did, it took you wherever you wanted. But, deep down, your soul was crying. It will never accept that you rejected her love because that was her true love. That love never stopped you because your ego will become unhappy. Your ego will make your tongue act out. But, mom's love knew that her love will stay happy as long you remain happy. Her love can see you go away than remain unhappy. This, my dear, is true love. It is the faith of the soul. It is the bond that always stays. Humans leave and so do their egos. But love has always won and will keep winning as long as it is true. Love never asks you for something. Love bears the pain. How easily shakespeare summarized it in one line...because unless the love is tested, it's worth cannot be measured.

I can guarantee you that if you love someone, love them always. Love them when they are gone. Just forget the bad things that happened. For one, just let it go. Wipe it off of your brain. You want some examples? How about the famous Shama-Parwana? Shama means fire, Parwana is used for the moth that just never stops flying around that fire lamp. Isn't that moth aware of the fatal energies of the fire? Moth said...yes and? Just as you thought you were losing control in love, you still loved. But why do you give up now? He or she offended you. And, you cannot trust him anymore. Fine. The deal is made. You tried and failed. But, wait a minute, did you push the other person's love away? So, how did you fail? Not for your ego. Never. You told yourself that I will move on because this love has failed. Ok, fine. Who will argue with you? It will never be your friends who will. After all, aren't they friends who want your happiness? See the irony? Friends will sooth you. But, can they probe you? Why would they? They will give you alternatives. They will patch the rough wounds. They will ask you to make yourself 'safe' by avoiding the person who hurt you. And, they are right. Because they know what you told them. It came from YOU - the brain, the mind, the ego. When you were hurt, you forgot to ask your heart or your soul. What would a soul know when the brain is making logical steps to keep you safe? Great. Didn't that just kill you when you said you are safe now? Let me just ask you this. Were you on seventh heaven when you said you feel safe now? I mean, did that give you joy? If it did, you should keep doing it. If it did not and trust me you know it did not, then choose the right path.

I sometimes wish people come face to face and be very relieved to break up. Some cases may be true, but some are quite artificial. They are made up. No one can tell, except you yourself. It is so because you cannot fail at any cost. You cannot become vulnerable again. Gandhi ji used to say, It's easy to slap someone. But, it's the hardest to ask for someone's forgiveness. You know why? Because asking belittles you. On top of that, if it's to accept your fault, just forget it. How dare you hurt your ego!! So, dear, saying sorry is a big thing. Trust the other person, when you receive one heartfelt sorry. And, come on. Trust yourself!!! You can always do it. You better do it because as long as you are on this earth, it's a never-ending stream. Love is the only medicine and love is the only refuge. You are free to try everything else. You can try to outsmart the traditions. You can think that you will not see this person again, so why not just throw away his or her love. After all, you've moved on. If you firmly believed in this, you are right. Not everyone wants to retry the same person when the history was bad. But, listen now. See through your soul's eyes on what is holding you back. Is it really his or her past behavior? Or, is it your own vulnerability? Or, is it just your ego? People mess up frequently in love. But, once the realization and true repentence sets in, it has that power to make your love more deep and mature. So, go ahead and make a decision because either way, it will be good for you. But, remember...prophets have said this again and again in many ways...

"And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course." -- Khalil Gibran (1883-1931)

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